For the fathers...

Kerry's picture

http://www.motherhelp.info/keepingyourchild.htm

 

 

"To understand a mother's love, bear your own children."
-- Chinese Proverb

Is your daughter pregnant?

Many parents have punished their daughters for life by pressuring them to surrender their own sons and daughters for adoption. Do you really want your grandchild to feel abandoned by his mother, father and by you? Do you want your grandchild calling some stranger "mom" while your daughter is degradingly referred to as a "birthmother" and you are just a "birth relative"? No matter what letters, pictures or contact they promise you, there is no guarantee you or your daughter will see your grandchild again. A very large percentage of so-called "open" adoptions close in the first year. It's devastating for the natural family. Some mothers even commit suicide.
 

Is your girlfriend pregnant?

You may be a father. A child who feels he has been abandoned by his father is more likely to abandon his own offspring. Learn about your rights and protect them for your child's sake. Even if you cannot marry his mother, your child still needs YOU to love and guide him. No one else can take your place. Fathers are of interest to adoption lawyers and agencies - they put special effort into denying fathers' rights so they can get more babies. Do feel confident in getting a paternity test after the baby is born - or even before the baby is born - but don't wait for the paternity test to start protecting your rights
and the rights of your child to have his own father.

Some states have Putative Father Registries, however, laws vary from state to state. To avoid the possiblity that a father might take responsibility for his own child, agencies sometimes transport mothers to another state to give birth or put a notice in a newspaper that is nowhere near a father's home town. So take the time to learn how to protect your rights and in addition, learn how you can nurture your child. To show your interest and intentions in advance you may be required by law to provide in some way for your child - by supporting your child's mother or buying a carseat, a stroller and some other baby items. And look up the laws for your state regarding paternity and putative father registry. (It's best to retain a lawyer, because some states try to avoid dads and get more babies for adoption Customers by providing bad links to on-line putative father's registy forms.)

Be sure to read the following article on father's rights:
SINGLE Fathers ("Birthfathers"): Preventing your infant from being adopted without your consent - from Erik L. Smith