Though I am not a great dater, looking back upon the various women I have had an interest in, they all are very different from one another, both physically and mentally. I guess I've always been looking for the perfect fit.
Looking back, much of my dating was based on who chose me, and how I learned to really like the guy. The not-so-subconcious thought being: I'm not worthy of making the first move or choice, so I will accept whoever finds me desirable, In my mind, this is not a gender weakness, but rather a direct result of being told I was "chosen" by my adoptive parents.
For the longest time I was ending-up in bed with the same looking guy. I thought I was really attracted to a certain type, but after a while I realized that was an association thing I had that really repulsed me.
I decided to be celibate for a while, because I hated how I kept falling for the same repeated destruction.
Now I know I avoid certain looks and dispositions because I know they will trigger nightmares and self loathing.
Comments
Fit
Though I am not a great dater, looking back upon the various women I have had an interest in, they all are very different from one another, both physically and mentally. I guess I've always been looking for the perfect fit.
Fit to choose
Looking back, much of my dating was based on who chose me, and how I learned to really like the guy. The not-so-subconcious thought being: I'm not worthy of making the first move or choice, so I will accept whoever finds me desirable, In my mind, this is not a gender weakness, but rather a direct result of being told I was "chosen" by my adoptive parents.
looks
For the longest time I was ending-up in bed with the same looking guy. I thought I was really attracted to a certain type, but after a while I realized that was an association thing I had that really repulsed me.
I decided to be celibate for a while, because I hated how I kept falling for the same repeated destruction.
Now I know I avoid certain looks and dispositions because I know they will trigger nightmares and self loathing.